A Tactical First Aid Kit for Surviving the Shock of Loss

Don't navigate the storm of widowhood alone.
A practical checklist for the first 365 days.

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Available on Kindle & Print

"If you can barely read this page, that's normal. It's called grief brain fog. You're not losing your mind."

The Fog is Real

In the first days after loss, your brain goes into survival mode. Simple decisions feel impossible. The paperwork piles up. Well-meaning advice becomes noise.

You don't need another grief book telling you to "feel your feelings." You need a tactical plan for the next 30 days.

That's exactly what this book provides.

BOOK MOCKUP

WIDOWHOOD

A Tactical First Aid Kit

WIDOWHOOD

A Tactical First Aid Kit for Surviving the Shock of Loss

Unlike a memoir, this is a tactical manual designed for the shock phase. Short chapters. Clear checklists. Zero fluff.

  • The 30-Day Freeze Rule — Stop the pressure for big decisions
  • The Paperwork Triage — Separate "Fire" from "Ice" bills
  • Social Scripts — Exact words for difficult situations
  • The Digital Vault — Preserve their memory before tech erases it
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"The 5 Bills to Pay This Week (and 12 You Can Ignore)"

Includes: Bill Triage Worksheet, Social Shield Scripts, Quick Start Guide

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Reflections on Strategy & Resilience

Grief is Not Linear

Some days you'll feel fine. Others, the wave hits without warning. Both are normal. This book meets you wherever you are.

The Myth of "Moving On"

You don't move on from loss — you move forward with it. The goal isn't to forget, but to build a life that honors their memory.

Strategy in the Chaos

When emotions overwhelm, systems save you. Simple checklists and scripts remove the burden of decision-making when you can barely think.

AUTHOR

PHOTO

Orlando Zelaya

Strategist. Author. Widower.

"On a Tuesday morning, everything was fine. By Wednesday, I was planning a funeral alone."

I'm Orlando Zelaya — Corporate Strategist by trade, widower by circumstance. When I lost my spouse, I discovered that grief doesn't wait for you to be ready. Bills arrive. Decisions demand answers. Life keeps moving.

I wrote the guide I wish someone had handed me. Not a book about feelings — a tactical manual for surviving the first year.

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Frequently Asked Questions

Stop. Breathe. Apply the 30-Day Freeze Rule: don't make any major financial decisions for at least 30 days. Focus only on immediate necessities — funeral arrangements and notifying close family. Everything else can wait.

Use the Paperwork Triage method from the book. Separate your mail into "Fire" (essential services like utilities, mortgage, insurance) and "Ice" (everything else). Only focus on the Fire pile for now. The Ice pile can wait weeks or even months.

Both. Loss doesn't discriminate, and neither does this book. The tactical advice applies regardless of gender. The checklists, scripts, and strategies work for anyone navigating the administrative chaos of losing a spouse.

Orlando Zelaya is a Corporate Strategist who became a widower unexpectedly. He combined his professional problem-solving skills with his personal experience to create the tactical guide he wished someone had given him.

Grief brain fog can last anywhere from a few weeks to several months, sometimes longer. It's your brain's way of protecting you from overwhelm. This book is designed specifically for this state — short chapters, clear checklists, zero fluff.

Not immediately. The 30-Day Freeze Rule applies here too — actually, for major decisions like selling your home, consider waiting 6-12 months. Grief can cloud judgment, and you may feel differently once the initial shock passes.

Wait at least 30 days for minor decisions, and 6-12 months for major ones (selling property, changing investments, relocating). The book provides specific timelines and checklists for different types of decisions.

Most bills can wait 2-4 weeks without serious consequences. Prioritize: mortgage/rent, utilities, and insurance. Credit cards, subscriptions, and non-essential services can wait. The book includes a complete Bill Triage Worksheet.